Getting married is not a small step. You are entwining your life with another person’s. You’ll live together, combine all of your stuff, and spend a lot of time together as a couple for the rest of your lives. This companionship is a great thing, but it can also be easy to lose yourself when you spend so much time with another person. However, it’s possible to have a happy marriage without losing yourself entirely. In fact, maintaining your sense of self is crucial to a happy marriage.
Thankfully, it’s easy to maintain some independence while married. First, keep up friendships outside of your marriage. Having meaningful relationships outside of your marriage will keep you balanced and provide you with more support so you aren’t completely reliant on your spouse. You should also try developing individual interests and hobbies. Just because your spouse hates doing something you like doesn’t mean you should give it up. Think of it as a way to invest in yourself and spend some time alone to recharge. Lastly, be open with your partner. Be honest and talk regularly about your relationship with each other and how you feel as individuals. If one of you feels too stifled, encourage the other to pursue things alone.
Your partner fell in love with you because of who you are. Working separately to maintain your interests and personality is actually the key to a healthy and happy relationship. You and your partner will constantly be reminded why you fell in love with the other person in the first place. Plus, when you take time to maintain your sense of self, you’ll have more to talk about at the end of day to help keep things interesting.